gsh | Do not panic

Dateline: Washington DC (ap)

"Do not panic", astronomers at the US Naval Observatory say. Inundated with phone calls from panicked citizens, astronomers say that while they do not know exactly what is happening, it appears not to be the end of the world. A large yellow ball is visible in the sky over Washington DC. Officials do not believe it is due to al Queda, or Saddam Hussein. Instead, astronomers say, it appears to be a long sought object called "a sun". "We've been predicting this for years, but no one really thought we'd see it" astronomer Greg Hennessy said, "it is important not to look directly at it with the naked eye. Long exposure may cause skin damage" he added. Scientists are busy studying the new object, which appears to subtend approximately half a degree in the sky (the approximate width of the full moon. Astronomers have no explanation for this other than coincidence). The new "sun" seems to be moving across the sky at slightly below sidereal rate, and is causing optical illusions known as "shadows" underneath trees and cars. "We advise people to be careful driving", Hennessy said, "but we honestly don't know how long it will be around."